Pet Monologues

To be posted VERY LOW on the refrigerator door - nose height.

Dear Dogs and Cats,

The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food.

The other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.

The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.
Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn’t help because I fall faster than you can run.

I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball when they sleep.

It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest possible extent . I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm.

For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for years - canine or feline attendance is not required. Read the rest of this entry »

How to tell if you are mom’s favorite.

Note: PG-13…

Ever had one of those days?

Who would be the next President of the animal kingdom…

Find some answers here

Join the forum discussion on this post - (2) Posts

For Halloween one needs a creative tool to dress up Fluffy and Buddy. Here it is! Dressup games. My cute pet dressup.

hunter

kokoa girl
Think your little Ethan’s a David Bowie in Crocs, your Isabelle’s the next Gwen Stefani, or your bulldog’s a ringer for Bono? Dress up your pint-sized guitar hero like a rock star, snap a picture, and upload your entry to the Independent Film Channel ( IFC ) “Dress Your Kid (and/or Pet!) Like a Rock Star” photo contest. Runners up win $500 each and the grand prize winner earns a cool $5000. Plus, the highest rated photo each week wins a $50 iTunes gift certificate. Enter as many photos as you like (one per day). And make sure to check out the photo gallery daily to rate the rockers. ( thank you john mccartney )

via speedcat hollydale

Cartoonist Mike Keefe

via denver post

Stumbled upon.

Aquarium toilet
Add a little life to your bathroom with this live aquarium. The fully functioning tank fits American Standard bowls. Custom bowl installation is available.

3/8″ acrylic tank
1.6 gpf. (federal standard)
22″ x 14″ x 9″ deep

Designer: Oliver Beckert

email us for ordering information: obeckert (at) yahoo (dot) com

8 weeks for shipping
Fish and aquarium components sold separately.

Rocking horse toilet.
A little of topic but think of saddle, i.e., riding a horse.

This concept challenges the traditional form of the toilet or “throne” by toying with the nostalgic familiarity of the rocking horse. However, the inclusion of foot pegs provides real health benefits by raising the knees above the waist, which facilitates a thorough expulsion of waste.

Designer: Perry Dixon email: desdix (at) yahoo (dot) com